Wednesday, May 16, 2007
Flashing shit and scary profiles everywhere
So, MySpace is weird. I don't really get it. I know that's not exactly a newsflash at this point. What can I say - I always end up checking things out after the popularity has already died down. So, I haven't joined it or anything, just recently was browsing through to see what has become of people I went to school with and such. And once I waited and waited for their retina-burning templates to load and for shit to flash and the text to become nearly indecipherable, I found that yes, there are still some of those people around and some of them have grown up! I take some comfort that I'm not the only one whose face has filled out, and definitely not the only one who now is looking their age. For some reason it surprised me though. Like even though I've aged, I assumed all these people would be looking as young and perky as they did when we graduated. Of course, most of them are married and have kids now, but are still "OMG, having a BLAST!! LOL!" and are just as rich and popular as they always were. And you know I hate to admit it, but I started feeling a little left out, or left behind. I'm still letting myself feel inferior to these people, just like I used to! Not just in the myspace world but the real world too. And that is what sucks. Sure, how people talk about themselves and their own lives is usually a bunch of bullshit intended to make others react a certain way, but this is the kind of idiotic thing that triggers a whole spiraling mess of self-doubt within me. And it's not even worth it. Why should I want to be like them? Maybe my goals are a lot smaller and slow-paced and less fancy than theirs but damnit in my own way I'm "making it" too. So there. Yeah. Look at me, I took a bad feeling and made it somewhat positive after all - ha!