So the other day this little boy came running up to me and said "Hey, hey lady! Do you have children?" and I was kind of like "No" like he should know that. But then I realized I'm the only one my age around here that doesn't have a little kid running around. Our building has become a popular place for some skanky baby-mommas and all they drama. What really pisses me off lately is when they sit outside on the front stoop (I can't even call it a front porch, it's not made to look inviting) ignoring their kids, being loud and blocking the entranceway. That's nice, so you can't just go about your business without having to cross these people. The newest neighbors have a little girl whom I've introduced myself to, but her "parents" are unlikely to give you a nod of recognition. I have no idea which baby daddy is which, but daaaang, these girls like some nasty dudes. Here's some examples of baby daddy requirements:
- must have truck that needs to be worked on and makes a lot of noise
- must get into verbal arguments in the parking lot about visitation rights
- must be shirtless or wear sleeveless shirts and baseball hats
- must have at least 3 creepy friends to come along when visiting the baby momma
- must be at least partially redneck or whiteboy-thug
I don't want to get paranoid, but that's what I do. I keep smelling something weird that's like the chemicals in a perm or sulfur. I can't figure out if it's just our nasty water or our nasty neighbors.