Wednesday, August 22, 2007


I don't know what it is, but I don't like it. Sometimes I look at how far I've come, and sometimes I feel like I'm worse than ever. Is it the cutback on the antidepressants? Could be. Or a bunch of other things. Or nothing really at all. My birthday is on Friday, the last b-day of my twenties. Oh, I know - don't get all sad and reflective. But you know I do. And also get overwhelmed with the feeling of "where did all that time go? And what do I have to show for it?" But then, this coming year some big things will happen and perhaps it will all just get better and better from here on out. Yeah...

I've just been down. Particularly unhappy with my job and not sure how much longer I should stay here. It's not that the job is bad, it's just that being here makes me feel bad. And, you know - reclusive, inferior, bitter, negative, etc. That's all. Maybe that's what it's like for most people. But then I kinda think there might be something out there that's a better fit. Then again, I also have the feeling that if I leave too soon - like on a depressed whim - I will really regret it and realize that I had it pretty good here. Meh.

I'm feeling frumpy and ugly and not particularly looking forward to getting a new license picture taken or giving the state $83 that I don't have for the new license and tags. Or getting a stupid new license plate because they decided to change the colors - I like the one I have! But, whaddaya do?

Sorry for being such a stick in the mud. I think I could use a haircut, some ibuprofen and some sort of comfort food. That usually helps.


Rootietoot said...

I'm going to tell you the truth. 30 rocks. Don't mourn the loss of the 20's. 40's even better.

iamnot said...

Don't worry. In 20 years you'll wish you felt this good.

(insert evil laugh)