Wednesday, January 03, 2007

Somethin's got to give

Oy. I thought about listing some resolutions for the New Year, but there are so many things I need to change that it just seems overwhelming and well, kind of depressing. Kind of REALLY depressing. My big problem that leads to several other mini-problems is that I procrastinate and don't want to deal with shit. But it's always looming there and making things worse, and before I know it I've got a whole pile of problems and don't know where to start with solving them. Christ, I think I need a whole personality makeover at this point. I mean, shit I've got weight loss - which is huge (ha ha) on it's own - to work on, home projects up the wazoo, loads of shit to organize so we can pay our bills like normal adults without digging through stacks of bullshit, being more like a "normal" functioning adult, regularly keeping up the house so it doesn't look like a bachelor pad, and among other things there's oh, that little matter of PLANNING a WEDDING which I haven't given nearly enough thought about, much less put things into action. It all stresses me out and seems so overwhelming, that I just... don't do it. I don't know exactly what it is, but I feel frozen, unable to move forward. Maybe I'm chicken-shit or maybe I'm just lazy. Or both.

I'm eating a slimfast bar for lunch and as expected - it's pretty feckin gross. Just like the drink, there's that lingering aftertaste of vitamins & minerals. Nastykins!


iamnot said...

Wow...I just spent my lunch eating a bag 'o tuna and paying a couple of past due bills.
We are seriously in sync...which frankly, scares hell out of me.

Becky said...

Once again, I could've written that post. Well, except the part about the wedding. And you put everything into words better than I do. So maybe I couldn't have written it. But I totally know what you mean. If that means anything. (:

quinn said...

The hardest part about trying to get some forward momentum going is that damn first step. I'm a big fan of lists. LOVE the list. Sometimes I make a list of all the lists I need to make. Okay, not really, but y'know, lists help me break everything up into smaller, more manageable steps. Then I don't get so overwhelmed by the big picture that all I can think about is pulling the toaster into the bathtub with me.